I have been receiving some strange emails. 

Tarquin assures me that they are something called "spam" and to be expected. (I have heard some of the staff speaking of spam, but I had always assumed it was some form of food for poor people). The latest item of spam that I have received was entitled "Learn the secrets of having a perfect body" and has turned up hot on the heels of last week's match photo, which is disturbing. More disturbing is "Women will be your resigned slaves" which is a travesty. Whilst I do expect utter and uncompromising devotion - slavery is not acceptable.